The Gift of the Present

Posted by Rabbi Shlomie Chein

Our sages state: If not now, when?

One may add: If not now, what?

One may conclude: If not now, naught!

We often think of the present as the link between the past and the future. i.e. there was a past, there will be a future, and in order to tie it all together, we have something called a now. We revere the past as vast and the future as infinite, yet the present is often perceived as a mere fleeting moment. We can spend endless hours studying history, and millions of dollars planning our destiny. But what time or consideration do we give the now?

This morning I said a prayer, tomorrow I will recite it again, but for now I would like to share what it means for the present.“The L-rd reigns, the L-rd reigned, the L-rd will reign forever”. The prayer is quite simple, and better yet, really short. But its format offers a deep appreciation of the now. When viewing the line of time we usually speak of the past, present and then future. The order of this prayer, however, mentions the present first, then the past and future.

From this prayer’s perspective, the present doesn’t merely link the past to the future; it creates them. First and foremost there must be a present; only then can we speak of a past or a future. Any memories you have of the past, any visions you have of the future, only exist because there is a present. If you didn’t exist in this moment, no other moment would exist in you.

The now is thus a powerful antidote to the past/future syndrome. Let’s use Jewish identity as an example. A big question amongst scholars and rabbis, global politicians and searching Jews is, what makes you Jewish? From a technical Halachic standpoint the issue depends entirely on the past. What makes you Jewish is simply your familial genealogy. If your mother is Jewish you are Jewish. From a homiletic perspective, one looks to the future. A cute (non-binding) thought has been circulating lately which maintains that one can be considered Jewish if his/her children and grandchildren are Jewish; i.e. if s/he managed to pass the torch along to the next generations.

Now, whilst both of those perspective attempt to define being Jewish, neither of them says much about living Jewish. The past and future can’t account for living Jewish. To live Jewish one must look at the present. Granted, you have a rich Jewish history, and yes, you hope to eventually contribute to the Jewish destiny; but what does your Judaism mean to you today? Aside from your parents or plans for parenting, how is your Jewishness expressed?

Thus the prayer puts it eloquently: all of G-d’s miracles of the past, and all of G-d’s promises for the future, begin with G-d’s relevance in the present. Ironically, the biggest challenge to the now is the very past and future it sustains. Often as soon as we start thinking about the importance of now, we immediately try to recall if every prior moment was lived, or if every future moment can be lived, to these standards. But that’s the problem. Those thoughts are essentially a return to the past/future perspective rather than the now! When we think of the power of now we are not supposed to think about every other now we had or will have. We are supposed to focus on the current now.

In his magnum opus, the Tanya, Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi describes the perfect achievement for the average Jew. This is not the level of Tzadik (sainthood) which he says is reserved for few, rather this is the level of the Beinuni (average), a state of being each and every Jew can accomplish. He describes it as a state of being in which one never did, nor will ever do, anything wrong.

At first glance this seems impossible if not contradictory. Are we really to believe that every Jew can achieve this? Do you even know of any Jew who has achieved this? Furthermore, how can something be achieved if its ends leave no room for the various stages of its means? I.e. how can someone ever overcome fault when the definition of overcoming means he never had fault?

But these questions only arise and remain in the past/future perspective. Rabbi Shneur Zalman, on the other hand, is focused on the now, and with this statement he is highlighting the power of the present. When he speaks of never did or will never do, he is not speaking of a time called the past or an era called the future; he is speaking of the wholesomeness of this moment.

His definition of perfection asks one question: In this moment, today, right now, are you beyond wrongdoing? If the past and future were to be shaped by the now, how would they look? If we were to view your entire life through the lens of now would we see a hint of past, or a likelihood of future, wrongdoing? It is so easy to abuse and neglect the now because of a stigma from the past or a concern for the future. This is because we think the now merely serves as a link to times bygone and times to come. But the now is much more than that. The prayer places the now first instead of having it get lost in the middle, to teach us that the now is the foundation for everything that was and everything that will be.

Perfect the now, says the rabbi, for if you perfect the now the past and future will mirror that perfection. After all, the latter merely exist as extensions of the former. Now, before you move on to the future leaving this article in your past, think about this: if there is truth to the adage “If not now, naught”, can you imagine the gift of a utilized present!

What Does the University Interfaith Council Do?

Posted by Pamela Urfer

(This article was originally published on the Diversity and Inclusion webpagehttp://studentaffairs.ucsc.edu/diversity/ – in August, 2010)

The University Interfaith Council (UIC) is composed of the dedicated representatives from twenty different faith-based groups – Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, Baha’i, Hindu, Sikh, American Indian and Christian – who work together to provide a wide range of support programs for students of many different faiths, both those students who arrive on campus as members of a faith group and those who choose to embrace a faith and spirituality as a result of their time spent in the UCSC community.

In many ways, the work of the UIC is similar to that of the Ethnic Resource Centers on campus, and plays a key role in creating and maintaining a positive climate for religious diversity at UC Santa Cruz. According to the 2006 CIRP survey, 48.9% of incoming UCSC students self-identify as practitioners of a religion. 52.1% will have attended a religious service in the past six months and 33.8% have discussed religion with their peers in the past year. Roman Catholics, at 17.5% are, by far, the largest self-identified group.

These figures mandate a positive and pro-active approach to the needs of these students, especially those first-years who have recently left behind a close and caring faith community. These students’ faith heritage is a basic and powerful aspect of their identities which can help them survive the changes and challenges incorporated within the university experience.

It is the goal of the UIC at Santa Cruz, working together with Student Affairs, to build a stronger sense of choice for students to practice and find their faith community on campus, provide and enhance opportunities for developing leadership skills, and link students to community service opportunities. To this end, our programs include celebrations and interfaith gatherings, worship/ meditation, educational events including religious study courses, community service, and spiritual care and counseling to students, faculty and staff.

The UIC also works to create a space for interfaith relationship building between students from different faith groups. The Student Interfaith Council is a loosely organized gathering of students interested in meeting with one another to share a meal and discuss their spiritual journeys and the values of their own faiths. Some of these students will form the core of the new UCSC Spirituality and Faith Theme House opening in Fall 2011.

The UIC attempts to provide a safe space for students to talk about their spiritual paths and aspirations, seek new growth experiences, and deal constructively and appropriately with negative reactions to their beliefs or cultural background. We champion any in the university community – student, staff or faculty – who suffer from religious bias and will work, through our involvement in the Chancellor’s Council for Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, to put an end to any such illegal and damaging practices.

Membership in the Interfaith Council is open to any faith-based group focused on serving the UCSC campus community. Representatives may be either adult ministers/rabbis/priests, interested lay persons, or student leaders of student-run groups. The loving co-operation practiced by the UIC’s members can be looked upon as a workable model of diversity and inclusion and belies the common misperception that religion inevitably leads to discord. We invite the entire UCSC community to celebrate their own faith walk with us and help promote tolerance, peace, and understanding toward all faiths and religious traditions.

SEX - Part IV

Posted by Pamela Urfer

Getting back to the original question asked in Lisa Miller’s Newsweek article – How can college-aged men and women best resist peer pressure to have sex, or, at least, resist the kind of sex they don’t want? As Donna Freitas says, Students “want the right to demand more from their peers when it comes to sex and relationships – more joy, more satisfaction, more commitment – and less sex.”

Perhaps we could think of this choice as one between “high level” and “low level” sex. I’m not talking here about the quality level of the sex act. There are plenty of books for advice on that. I’m talking about the emotional, relational, and spiritual level of sex. It may be hard for some to imagine a “spiritual” component to pre-marital sex, but many who are sexually active on campus are searching for precisely that. They want to know how to conduct an affair that is respectful, responsible and constructive for the persons involved. They want to know how to practice kindness, consideration and truthfulness in a relationship, and how to refrain from using the other to satisfy their own selfish needs.

For a moment, let’s imagine the unimaginable: two college or grad students, perhaps even Christian students, begin a serious affair, moving in together. If they were older, out of school, they might have planned a wedding. But they both know this is not the right time to marry. In an earlier, more “Biblical”, age this couple would have been married off by their families as soon as they reached sexual maturity – at fourteen for girls and perhaps sixteen for boys – a natural remedy for their burgeoning sexual urges and desires. Surely this is what Saint Paul meant by advising “it is better to marry than to burn.”

But this is America, and education trumps nature. Careers , and enhanced earning power, await and must be prepared for. This is the path we as a culture have chosen and the young must suffer for it. God is not the only, nor, perhaps, the most important, person expected to have a say in such matters. The young people have not finished their studies, and neither family would countenance marriage at this point. Their families counsel restraint – perhaps for years. Easy for them to say. But the young people must acquiesce. After all, it’s the families who are paying the bills.

Couples who choose pre-marital co-habitation cannot be considered “spouses,” with the (perhaps illusory) permanence that entails. But they should aim, at the very least, at being “friends,” people who act towards each other in a trustworthy, caring and reliable manner, like non-sexual friends. They shouldn’t have to think of the one with whom they are having sex as a rival, enemy, liar, user, or traitor. Although these relationships are not, at the moment, permanent, neither one of the couple should have to wake up in the morning wondering if their partner has left in the night.

In scripture, God has given us much good advice in conducting relationships, from “A gentle answer turns away wrath” to “Do not let the sun go down on your anger,” to “Love is patient and kind, it is not jealous or conceited or proud. Love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable. It does not keep a record of wrongs.” If we could all achieve relationships like this, life would be happier all around.

What these young people should be learning are the skills needed to argue constructively, avoid pushing each other’s buttons, and treat each other with respect and kindness. If the arrangement fails to become permanent, as lots of marriages do, at least the skills learned here may help create a stronger tie with partners who come later. And it might even lead to marriage itself. Mine did – going on forty-four years now.